Soccer with Iron Maiden: Dusting off my boots with rock stars
WESTFIELD, Ind. — When legendary British rockers Iron Maiden hit the road, they do what any warm-blooded, footy-obsessed blokes from across the pond might do. They seek out a game.
Thus, as the band’s Legacy of the Beast Tour rolled along stateside with a show at Ruoff Home Mortgage Music Center on Saturday, Iron Maiden reached out to the Indy Eleven to arrange a friendly; the club obliged.
The Eleven assembled a cast of washed-up retreads for the occasion — mostly front-office personnel, but also including yours truly — to take on the band and its travelling staff Friday afternoon at Grand Park.
“They want to play against people closer to their age in the 35-plus range who know how to play a little,” explained Indy Eleven senior director of communications and marketing John Koluder. “But they also don’t want to play against any ringers.”
Fair enough. Given those stipulations and apparently sitting on a shortage of non-ringers, Koluder “made a beeline” for me, as he put it. Thanks, John.
Having played soccer at a decently high level growing up while also having barely touched a ball in the last 15 years, I figured I’d need some extra training and motivation in order to not completely embarrass myself. Several pick-up futsal games, Orangetheory Fitness workouts and David Goggins videos later, I felt ready to grace the pitch.
‘Twas an absolute blast.
Thanks to having a few members of the Indy Eleven coaching staff on our squad, we jumped out to a 3-0 lead and held on for a 5-2 win. Eleven head coach Martin Rennie and assistants Juan Guerra, Phil Presser and Andy Swift all suited up, which certainly tipped the balance in our favor – especially Guerra, who played for the Eleven just last season. His courteous 70% effort was still light years ahead of everyone else.
For the Iron Maiden side, bassist and original bandmember Steve Harris displayed skills that defied his years. After the band posted a left-footed goal of his on Instagram that dipped into the top shelf in a recent match in Pittsburgh, I figured I might want to pay the 63-year-old a little extra attention defensively. Sure enough, Harris played mostly as a central attacking midfielder, and since I spent much of my time at fullback and center back, I made it a point to close space on him as quickly as possible.
One time, the turf monster got the best of Harris as he lost his footing while dribbling and took a hard tumble, only to instantly get back up without even losing possession. I don’t know too many millennials who would’ve gotten up unfazed that swiftly, let alone someone on the wrong side of 60. He also regularly shouted uplifting instructions to his teammates when he sensed their effort was waning. Harris’ technical ability and passion for the game are what I’ll remember most from the match.
Iron Maiden’s Legacy of the Beast Tour features The Raven Age as the opening act. Harris’ son, George, plays guitar in The Raven Age and also plays footy for the Iron Maiden team along with one of Steve’s other sons, Stanley.
As we took off our gear in the locker room, I heard a familiar voice issuing me a compliment from across the room, much to my surprise. It was Rennie, who told me that I played well. He’s either too nice or a good liar.
“You know, Coach, I’m out of contract,” I quipped.
If there’s one glaring reason why I chose to pursue a career in soccer journalism over playing the sport, it’s because there’s no backspace key for a dreadful first touch.
Follow Kevin on Twitter: @KJboxing.
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